Dr. Robyn Silverman on The Today Show Talking about Body Image & Her New Book!

Dr. Robyn sat down with Meredith Vieira on The Today Show to talk about body image, her book Good Girls Don’t Get Fat, and the alarming trends of low body esteem in girls. A recent poll shows that 95 percent of girls between the ages of 16 and 21 want to change their bodies in [...]

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“Hi Robyn; We’re fine. It missed us by 2 street blocks.  We’re fine, our houses are fine. So sorry we weren’t able to call or text during the storm.  We love you guys.”

Oklahoma hurricane 300x168 Parents; How to Talk to Your Children about The Oklahoma TornadoIn the recent past, I’ve written articles about how to talk to children about horrifying events such as the SandyHook, Connecticut shooting and The Boston Marathon bombing.  In both articles, while incredibly concerned, I was not touched personally by the tragedies.  I had lived in Boston for many years (I received my PhD from Tufts University near Boston) and made many friends there—but nobody I knew had attended the marathon and all were perfectly safe during the tragedy.

Yesterday, a massive tornado hit Moore, OK.  I couldn’t believe it when I saw the name in the news.  Moore?  I have a deep personal tie to Moore.  Both my children were born there.  Both of their adoptions took place in Moore.  And most significantly, the birth family of both my children still live in Moore.  Their birth mother, their birth father and their birth grandmother.

Many of you who are constant, devoted readers of my parenting site know that we have an open adoption plan with my children’s birth family.  This is not just on paper.  We are extremely close with the birth family—so much so that none of us regard each other as “birth family” and “adoptive family” (I only use those names here to avoid confusion)—we just call each other family.

I am so happy to report that our family members in Moore are all safe.  The message on the top of this article was left by our children’s birth grandmother.  We have been in contact over the last 2 days and while our whole family had quite a scare, they got out of the storm unscathed.  The tornado passed 2 miles away from my kids’ birth father’s house and a ¼ mile from his girlfriend’s place of work.  He was holed up in a bank vault for safety while my kids’ birth mother took refuge in a Walmart with a hundred other people.  The kids’ birth grandmother literally drove herself away from the oncoming storm.  The whole thing is beyond scary.

The experience has given me a more nuanced perspective of how to talk to children about frightening events such as this tornado in Oklahoma.  Since my children (especially my 4 year old) know about the storm and how it affected our family, it is from this perspective that I write my tips today.

(1) Ensure your children know that this tornado is not a threat to their safety: “Is the tornado coming here” my daughter wondered?  Sometimes just saying; “no, it’s all done” is enough.  Other times, for the very curious child, this may be a good  for a little weather lesson.  You can say; “Just [click to continue…]

Mind Your Manners! 5 Ways to Tame Rude & Crude Behavior in Your Children

April 30, 2013 Parenting tips

Dr. Robyn Silverman answers one parent’s question about how to instill manners in her children– especially when they haven’t been overtly enforced in the past. When children are very young, making people laugh or getting a look of shock is easy encouragement for someone looking for a little extra attention.  While it may not be [...]

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Mom & Dad; Are we safe? Talking to your children about scary things presented in the news

April 16, 2013 Dr. Robyn Silverman

As we now all know, yesterday’s tragic bombing at the Boston Marathon resulted in at least 176 people injured.  Nine of them are children—at least 8 of whom are being treated in hospitals.  One child, 8-year-old Martin Richard, was killed during the Boston Marathon explosion while enjoying ice cream with his family. His 6 year [...]

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Ask Dr. Robyn: Teaching Children to Keep a Positive Attitude In New Situations

April 9, 2013 Parenting tips

Dear Dr. Robyn, My daughter will be going to a new school next school year. She didn’t have a positive experience this year since her friends got into a fight, asked her to choose sides, and she refused to do so.  They wound up both turning on her.  She now wonders if it’s her and [...]

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Boy Toys, Girl Toys and What Kids Learn When We Allow Them To Choose

April 2, 2013 Dr. Robyn Silverman

As a parent, I often wonder about how the toys and role models in my children’s lives translate to behavior.  I tend to be the kind of mother who encourages a wide range of toys, games and books.  I am less about banning (unless it is truly counter to our family’s core character-based values) and [...]

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Picture Day, Hot Pink Socks and Raising an Assertive Daughter: When Values Can’t Be Conditional

February 25, 2013 Parenting tips

“I want to wear the pink socks.” “Honey, you have a blue and white dress on.  Please just wear the white socks.” “But I want to wear the pink socks!” “Tallie, I’m exhausted.  Please stop arguing with me.” “I want to wear the pink socks!” “Fine! Wear the pink socks!” My 4 year old daughter [...]

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Pregnancy By Proxy: The Out Of Body Experience of Open Adoption

February 21, 2013 Dr. Robyn Silverman

In honor of our daughter’s 4th birthday, I am republishing some of my adoption articles. This is the third article in the series. Happy Birthday to our sweet baby girl. Believe me.  This was not what I had envisioned when I thought about pregnancy for myself.  I was more of a traditional gal—thinking that the [...]

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The Infertility Club: Shifting My Goal from Pregnancy to Adoption

February 20, 2013 Parenting tips

In honor of my daughter’s 4th birthday, I’m republishing my adoption series. As you can probably imagine, I felt like the shoemaker’s daughter. I didn’t just work with children and families, I provided parenting tips and tactics to moms and dads around the world…all the while housing a secret that taunted and tortured me every [...]

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Finally Forever: The Life-Changing Letter and Our Decision to Adopt

February 19, 2013 Parenting tips

It seems like only yesterday when my daughter was just a little baby. I can’t believe it! My daughter is 4 years old today.  In honor of her birthday, I am republishing this letter I wrote to my family and friends telling them that my husband and I were planning to adopt. To all those [...]

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