Verizon Viral Ad for Girls: What are We Telling Our Daughters about Math and Science?

It was a great Good Morning America segment this morning!  We focused on a new viral Verizon campaign and ad that questions whether it’s time to move from telling our girls that she’s simply “pretty” to telling them that they are “pretty brilliant” too. What are we telling our girls about their abilities in math and science?  Can we attract more girls into STEM?  We explored this topic.

GMA_verizongirlsvideo_800400Why are we seeing greater numbers of ads reaching out to young girls and women giving them the message they can be more?

First, let’s not forget that these companies want to sell products and in these ads they are appealing to big markets, women and girls. But aside from that, I think these companies are seeing that by moving away from looks and celebrating the strong minds of girls, they can inspire a larger pool of future game-changers.  These are the people who can invent something important and become the next generation of leaders in their companies. We are looking for leaders, not hood ornaments.

The ad quotes a statistic- 66% of 4th grade girls say they like science and math, but only 18% of all college engineering majors are female. So where does the disconnect happen? Is it the fault, as the ad suggests, of parents?

Parents get such a bad rap—but it’s not just parents, it’s society as a whole.  If a girl is interested in Science, Technology, Engineering or Math, many of the toys that support those interests are in the “boy” section, the protagonists of the majority of books & movies in this genre are boys—and while there are companies and wonderful grass roots efforts to change that, there is still a Read more

Louis C.K.’s “Fat Girl” Scene Strikes a Cord with Women Everywhere

Last week, I was on Good Morning America to talk about Louis C.K.’s now famous “Fat Girl” scene in which actress Sarah Baker, gives a unique and honest perspective about being “a fat-girl in her 30s living in New York City.” And while some still complained that the scene was far from perfect, others found it “absolutely magnificent.”  Vanessa, the character played by Baker, simply put her opinions out there, without sadness or apology, and said what was on her mind.

GMA_mayphoto_800_400_cropWhy did it strike such a nerve?

In short; when we are used to seeing fantasy, photoshop and fabrication of the truth, a little raw honesty goes a long, long way.  The character of Vanessa is vivacious, smart, interesting and beautiful and she tells Louis without any self pity, be honest with me, be honest with yourself and realize by saying “you’re not fat,” you discount me, you refuse to see me and you join the legions of others who stereotype because of my weight.  Being “fat” doesn’t take away a person’s gifts and strengths.  Being plus-size and amazing are not mutually exclusive.  Can’t she just be who she is and still be loved and celebrated?

What does this segment tell men?

This 7 minute segment tells men to (1) break the bond between the term fat and the ugly stereotypes that are unfairly associated with it, (2) hang up your hang ups and be with the person who you like and who brings out the best in you and (3) realize that the problem of stereotyping women is not just a woman problem, it’s everyone’s problem—don’t be another of society’s lemmings, be part of the solution.

What’s one thing we can take from this scene?

People aren’t seeing themselves reflected in the media and this is warping our concept of what is normal. I think society needs to see and hear from someone who so obviously breaks the stereotype, that everyone is worthy of being loved, everyone of us brings something important to the table and “fat” and “thin” are simply descriptors of body types not of worth or character.

Brief aside: I really enjoyed doing this segment on Good Morning America.  And an extra perk?  I met theJimParsonsBBT enormously talented Jim Parsons that day who was also there.  Bonus!  Or should I say, Bazinga!

Now back to Louis C.K.  What did you think of the segment?

Dr. Robyn Signature

Lorde of the Tweets: Lorde tells fans it’s ok to have flaws

On Good Morning America this morning, we talked about Grammy-winner, Lorde and her most recent viral tweet that showed two photos.  One photo showed Lorde with flawless skin, photoshopped to perfection.  The other photo showed Lorde completely natural, skin imperfections and all.

Lorde & body positive tweet

Why is this significant? Lorde is a superstar with millions of fans.  And in a society that often makes you feel like you’re not good enough as you are and that celebrities just walk around like the picture of perfection, Lorde’s voice is refreshing. She all at once tells us that we all have flaws, she’s not perfect and that we are all OK just as we are.

Is her message for girls or can it apply to boys as well? We know the pressure that girls are under to look a certain way. Lorde is a great role model for girls because she embraces her flaws. But I think this is something everyone needs to hear in a society that often makes you feel that you need to be photoshopped before you walk out in public.

What can moms do for girls who might be self conscious? I was presenting on the power of media messaging just last night and here are some Read more

Heavy choices: Would you put your 7 year old on a diet?

This morning I was on the set up for a segment on Dara-Lynn Weiss- the mother who was made famous for publicly putting her daughter, age 7, on a diet. Her daughter’s doctor had told Dara-Lynn that her daughter was obese and was immediately put on a strict diet of limited foods and counting calories.

What would you do in the same situation? It’s a difficult choice. Clearly the doctor was concerned about the child’s health and we are all too familiar with the psychological repercussions of children, dieting and weight stereotyping.

Every parent wants their children to grow up healthy and happy. So it’s not surprising that when a parent hears their children’s weight is compromising their health, that they jump into action . But parents need to tread lightly here. Whatever you say to your children about weight and diet will provide the template for how those children will regard weight and diet for the rest of their lives. Will they see food as a delicious way to gain energy and health or will they view food as the enemy?

There are so many messages that tell children that they are not good enough the way that they are— we don’t want to convey a value judgment when it comes to food and weight, but rather, teach our children that when we eat in healthy ways, we gain the energy we need to live our best life. I believe we can change a child’s relationship with food without putting a child on a “diet” – do you?

Take a look at the segment. What do YOU think? If you were this mother, would you choose the same path or would you do something different?

TV Anchor, Jennifer Livingston, Called Fat: Fights Back Against Her Body Bully

(Note; My Today Show Health Report Interview on this topic included below)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdJ2jHii6Y0]

The internet blew up yesterday with applause for Jennifer Livingston, a TV anchor in Wisconsin, who spoke out about fat hatred and what I call, “body bullying” after receiving a derogatory email from a viewer about her weight.

The viewer’s email read;

“Obesity is one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain. I leave you this note hoping that you’ll reconsider your responsibility as a local public personality to present and promote a healthy lifestyle.”

Jennifer fired back with a very thoughtful, stern and directed response.

“The internet has become a weapon. Our schools have become a battleground. And this behavior is learned – it is passed down from people like the man who wrote me that e-mail. If you were at home talking about the fat news lady – guess what? Your children are probably going to go to school and call someone fat. We need to teach our kids how to be kind – not critical and we need to do that by example. So many of you have come to my defense over the past four days.

To my colleagues and friends from today and from years ago…my family, my amazing husband and so many of you out there that I will probably never have the opportunity to meet – I will never be able to thank you enough for you words of support. And for taking a stand against this bully. We are better than that e-mail. We are better than the bullies that would try to take us down.

And I leave you with this… to all the children out there who feel lost…who are struggling with your weight, the color of your skin, your sexual preference, your disability – even the acne on your face…listen to me right now. Do not let your self worth be defined by bullies. Learn from my experience that the the cruel words of one…are nothing compared to the shouts of many.”

I was interviewed by the Today Show Health Report about this incident.

Livingston’s move is a step toward civility in a society that thinks a woman’s weight is fair game, said Dr. Robyn Silverman, a body image expert and author of the book “Good Girls Don’t Get Fat: How Weight Obsession is Messing Up Our Girls & How We Can Help Them Thrive Despite It.”

“I applaud her for her response,” Silverman said. “It was a very responsible response.”

We’ve become a “fault-finding” society where it’s acceptable to make snarky comments about anyone, but especially those in the public eye, Silverman said.

When Livingston stood up to the mean-spirited viewer, she was helping combat the messages that say it’s OK to judge people based on weight.

“We send the message to our children that they are not good enough, they are not valuable enough, unless they look a certain way,” Silverman said.

While the fat-shaming speaks volumes to the girls and young women today who must constantly hear these messages wherever they go, it wasn’t the direct slams on Livingston’s weight that frustrated her the most.

On the Today Show this morning, Livingston told Savannah Guthrie;

“I can deal with being called fat … with being called obese. It was calling me a bad role model that rubbed me the wrong way, and not only a bad role model for our community, but for young girls, in particular.”

Young girls need to see and hear that they can be and do whatever they dream of in life– that their determination, hard work, smarts and talents will put them in the forefront- no matter what their weight, size, height or overall appearance.  We need more women (and men) like Jennifer Livingston who stand up and tell the world that they are worthy just the way they are– and that bullies should not and will not define them.  But they especially need to hear that as girls and young women, that they are valuable too– that they set their own path and their own definition of worth.  Jennifer Livingston did just that– and for that, I truly applaud her.

Yes, she certainly seems like a role model to me.

Lady Gaga Vogue Cover Airbrushed Beyond Recognition: My Interview

I was recently interviewed about Lady Gaga’s Vogue Cover.

Perhaps people feel that all’s fair in love and fashion, but the Lady Gaga Vogue cover photo speaks much more that a thousand words. See the video of her photo-shoot here.

When a Superstar like Gaga is known for encouraging every young person to be proud for being “born this way,” embracing extreme photo-shopping can feel incongruent.  She is made to look impossibly thin, poreless and perfect.

Young kids may look at that photo and think, ‘if even this outspoken, unique, quirky icon can’t be authentically herself, what does it say about her message and what does it say about me?’ We need our revered celebrities to take a stand and tell the media where they must draw the line. Read more

Dr. Robyn on The Today Show: Vintage Ads Say Thin was Not Always In

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRGdNH8qKpg]

These days, the word “fat” comes with a lot of baggage.  Studies tell us that fat is continually associated with unflattering words like lazy, ugly, blameworthy, gross, and unpopular.  But it wasn’t always that way.  If you look at some of the vintage ads, thin was definitely NOT always in.

“Enjoy life!” “Put on 5 pounds of flesh!” “Left out because you’re too skinny?” Vintage ads paint the picture that full-figured women were the beauty standard of their era.

Over the last 100 years the celebrated standard of body beauty in advertising has morphed from one that was more voluptuous (signifying vitality, wealth, and happiness) to one that is thin (signifying, sometimes erroneously, health, perfection and self control). In the early part of the 20th century actresses and models demonstrated the voluptuous trend—prompting beauty products and subsequent advertising to address the desire to put ON weight. Things changed dramatically in the 60s with the introduction of Twiggy, in the 80s with the fitness craze (think Jane Fonda), the 90s with the introduction of the waif, and now, we still receive messages (and the studies reflect this), that to be thin is to be beautiful, sexy, controlled, successful and good. Beauty products and advertising has followed suit.

These days it seems that people say the word “fat” like they are spitting it out on a plate.  This can be really confusing and upsetting for young girls who are going through puberty—a time when it’s very normal and natural to gain an average of 25 pounds! As a young girl or women is gaining weight, many look at it as “getting fat.” It’s common that people bemoan ‘I feel fat” or call themselves ugly names like “whale,,” “pig,” or “heifer.”

What would it have been like to live at a time when people thought it was more beautiful to be buxom that thin? Or is the pressure the same whether it’s to be thin or to gain weight in order to fit in?

It seems like a lot more women would have fit the ideal standard if we weren’t told that we all needed to be impossibly thin to be considered attractive. But then, naturally thin women would have been left out to the definition of beauty.

At the end of the day, it still comes down to marketing. As long as there has been women’s beauty products and advertising, there have been (and there will be) messages that tell girls and women that they are not good enough, not beautiful enough, and not worthy enough unless they buy these products…and use them.

How do you think it would impact YOU and the women in your life if their was pressure to gain weight rather than lose it?

 

 

 

The Revolution Reveal: 20 Day Swimsuit Challenge

It was so fun to be back on The Revolution for the 20 Day Swimsuit DrTiff1 300x227 The Revolution Reveal: 20 Day Swimsuit ChallengeChallenge Reveal with Ryan-Ashley and Terry- newly confident and ready to show the world just how beautiful they are! Positive body image never looked so good!

How do you look great in a swimsuit this summer? Remember to be confident in yourself.  It’s not about diets and bashing your body– it’s about loving yourself and embracing your curves.  Yes, we always want to make healthy choices for ourselves AND part of being healthy is reminding your brain that you are beautiful and worthy just the way you are. Banish the body bully within that tries to tell you a different story.

drrobynsig170 The Revolution Reveal: 20 Day Swimsuit Challenge

The Revolution Reveal: 20 Day Swimsuit Challenge is a post from: Dr. Robyn Silverman – Child Development Specialist, Body Image Expert, Success Coach & the Creator of the Powerful Words Character Development System

Summer Body Confidence: Dr. Robyn Silverman on The Revolution

Swimsuit season is often a time when many people feel insecure about their bodies.  We tend to hear lots of concerns. Thighs are too big.  Stomach isn’t flat enough.  Boobs and butt aren’t where they’re supposed to be anymore.

DrTiff 300x227 Summer Body Confidence: Dr. Robyn Silverman on The RevolutionOn the set of The Revolution, along with Dr. Tiffanie Davis Henry, I speak with 2 women who are embarking on a 20 day swimsuit challenge.  My feeling is that the real change must come from the inside.  How they feel about their bodies, how they talk to themselves, and how they recognize all the wonderful things their bodies allow them to do everyday can change their perspective.

TimGunnB 300x215 Summer Body Confidence: Dr. Robyn Silverman on The RevolutionWhat do you think?  I’ll be back in the studio for the “reveal” and we’ll see how far these women have come! What wonderful people– and I loved meeting Dr. Tiffanie and Tim Gunn. Lots of fun…looking forward to reveal day!

drrobynsig170 Summer Body Confidence: Dr. Robyn Silverman on The Revolution

Summer Body Confidence: Dr. Robyn Silverman on The Revolution is a post from: Dr. Robyn Silverman – Child Development Specialist, Body Image Expert, Success Coach & the Creator of the Powerful Words Character Development System

Plastic surgery to look like a celebrity: Dr. Robyn on The Anderson Cooper Show

Anderson women beauty Plastic surgery to look like a celebrity: Dr. Robyn on The Anderson Cooper Show

Credit: Anderson

There is a disturbing trend, according to plastic surgeons, that shows that more people are going under the knife to look like their favorite celebrities.  Jennifer Lopez. Carmen Electra. Megan Fox. These are some of the favorite target faces, boobs, and butts of plastic surgery clients in America.

Whether it’s to slim down with lipo, get butt implants, undergo botox or augment the breasts, some women are getting multiple procedures at young ages. I sat down with some of the women who are past or current plastic surgery clients to talk about my views of this practice and how we can refocus on what’s truly important.

Brandie, the woman in the middle of the photo, tells us in the preview of the show; “When you look beautiful, that’s how you make money. Doesn’t everyone want to make money?” Do you agree? What do you think of getting plastic surgery to look like a celebrity?  Worth the risk or not?

(Preview of show below)

YWUxYTE1MyZvZj*w Plastic surgery to look like a celebrity: Dr. Robyn on The Anderson Cooper Showvideo platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

Plastic surgery to look like a celebrity: Dr. Robyn on The Anderson Cooper Show is a post from: Dr. Robyn Silverman – Child Development Specialist, Body Image Expert, Success Coach & the Creator of the Powerful Words Character Development System