Parenting can be stressful. Places to go, people to see, homework to do, dinner to cook, laundry to fold, and a mile long list of to-dos that have been accumulating since 1999. A fresh mouth and uncooperative behavior can be just the thing that breaks the camel’s back for some parents. They want their children to show our Powerful Word of the Month, discipline, and for some parents, according to some recent studies, that means physical disciplinary action.
Discipline and children is certainly a touchy subject. Parents can go head to head about the pros and cons of certain disciplinary methods– but no disciplinary method is more touchy than physical discipline like spanking.
How do you discipline your children? How do you know if it’s the right method for your children? It’s hard to know. There are so many different ways of disciplining children. Some do time-outs. Some ground their kids or take away some of their privileges. Some simply reward positive behavior and discuss poor behavior while others spank. Some use a combination of these techniques and others change their methods as children develop.
Of course, it’s natural for children to make mistakes as they are growing and learning– that’s how they become productive adults. Our choice with regard to how to discipline them can also make an impact.
According to two longitudinal studies (meaning they studied the same children over a considerable length of time) adjusting to a child’s cognitive ability and developmental age is typical of parents. As children get older, parents are less likely to use physical discipline such as slapping, spanking, or hitting with something like a paddle or whatever happens to be in the parent’s hand at the time. This is certainly no laughing matter—researchers found that if parents continue using physical punishment as their children develop into teenagers, the teens are more likely to have behavior problems.
“Given these findings, mental health specialists and others who work with families should encourage parents to refrain from using physical discipline,” –Jennifer E. Lansford, associate research professor with the Social Science Research Institute and Center for Child and Family Policy at Duke University.
A 2005 study by Lansford’s team also showed that regardless of the cultural norm in 6 different countries, children who are physically disciplined with spanking and other such approaches are more likely to be anxious and aggressive than children who are disciplined in other ways. The U.S is one country in which spanking is still used often.
Other studies have also found that:
- Boys are spanked more than girls;
- Mothers spank more than fathers;
- Toddlers and preschoolers are spanked most often,
- Parents from lower income groups spank more often;
- Parents who have more education are less likely to spank;
- Religious conservatives are more favorable towards spanking; and
- Some groups, based on cultural and/or ethnic background are more likely to spank their children.
While parents in the United States are more likely to spank than in several other European countries, the trend towards spanking has decreased. Data show that 90% of children and adults “remember” being spanked as children. However, according to Murray A. Straus (2000), during the years 1968 and 1998, “the percent agreeing that a ‘good hard spanking is sometimes necessary’ dropped from near unanimity to 55 percent.”
Do you remember being spanked? How did it shape you? How do you parent now when it comes to discipline?
The Current Studies:
Where were the studies conducted? Duke University, Oklahoma State University, the University of Pittsburgh, Auburn University, and Indiana University.
Where were they published? September/October 2009 issue of Child Development
Who was in the studies? One study followed 500 children from ages 5-16 years and the other study followed 250 children from age 5 to 15 years.
“They should also help parents—especially mothers who are at high risk of using harsh physical discipline because they have children whose behavior is challenging or they are dealing with a lot of stress in their environment—come up with alternate strategies for disciplining their children.”
The research questions: How does discipline change during childhood to adolescence?
Are there factors within the families and children that correlate with these changes?
According to the studies, parents find that physical discipline is less developmentally appropriate as the
children grow older. Those who discontinued physical punishment after their children were young, were less likely to have teens with behavioral problems. For those families who continued to use physical punishment, there children paid for it in behavioral problems.
“Low income, low educational attainment, single parenthood, family stress, and living in a dangerous neighborhood form a constellation of risk that increases the chances that parents will continue to use physical discipline with their children,” Lansford adds. “Parents are also more likely to continue using physical discipline with children who behave aggressively.”
So, what are your thoughts? How were you disciplined and how will you/do you choose to discipline as a parent?
Lansford et al. Trajectories of Physical Discipline: Early Childhood Antecedents and Developmental Outcomes. Child Development, 2009; 80 (5): 1385
